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30 January 2009 @ 09:49 pm
Therapy  
This was half written at school, when (!) I didn't have much to do. It would have included every mental disorder I could think of (Which is many) but I don’t have time to write anymore. So I kept it short and sweet. *Beams*. Unbeta-ed, Of course.


Therapy


She didn’t look too different from most women her age, but there was something slightly unsettling about her. She wasn’t... right. The clipboard and glasses she carried weren’t right either. The fact that she crowded the entire group into a small room for a session of therapy was questionable.

Not that Eeteuk was to complain about the therapy part. Over the past three years, he had accepted that the entire band was full of members who were irrevocably insane. But he’d always thought that therapy was conducted one on one.

“I thought therapy was conducted one on one,” Kibum said, drawling lazily from behind a bouncing HyukJae.

She simply raised an eyebrow and wrote something on her clipboard, muttering something about delusions.

“No really,” Kibum continued. “Isn’t there supposed to be...”

Sungmin coughed, and whispered ‘Group Therapy’ into Kibum’s ear. Kibum went quiet. The rest of the band engaged in a unanimous “...Oh”.

“I have been called here,” she began, nestling her clipboard daintily on her knee and staring at the huge group over her glasses, “Due to suspicions that your... lifestyle has encouraged harmful behaviour. Would you agree?”

“Oh! Yes,” Donghae replied, grinning in what Eeteuk considered to be an entirely inappropriate way. “Yehsung-hyung slips all the time on stage, and he’s always hurting himself.... Aren’t you hyung? That’s harmful, right?”

“You mean to say you self harm?” she continued, staring at Yehsung with alarm.

Yehsung coughed. “Not... Well, no, not on purpose, but if hurting myself is something that you...”

“This is worse than I thought!” she babbled. The Super Junior members simply shifted uncomfortably, except for Yehsung; so absorbed was he in pleasing this otherwise creepy woman that he didn’t realise his mistake. Ryeowook, failing to grab her attention, leaned forward and gently tapped her knee. She sqealed and stood in her chair.

“Uh... I...”

“DO NOT BECOME VIOLENT WITH ME, SIR!” she screamed, getting down and pulling her chair several feet away from the Eternal Magnae. “OR I WILL CALL THE GUARDS!”

“... You have guards?” Kyuhyun’s eyes widened. Eeteuk could remember when the young member had had a bad experience with a guard who, when Kyuhyun was only joining the group, thought that the singer was an imposter.

“Paranoia! This just gets worse and worse!”

Eeteuk sighed, sinking his head into his hands. She was right. This was progressively becoming a disastrous adventure. He would need to strangle someone soon.

Eunhyuk, apparently deeming now the appropriate point for him to join the fray, cheerfully interjected. “Oh, Mrs-Therapist-Sshi, it’s not Kyuhyunnie that you have to worry about, it’s Fish-man over there,” he said, pointing to Donghae, who barely blinked. Kangin whispered something in Eeteuk’s ear, and the leader suddenly grinned. “There was this one time when there was a comet coming down to earth, and he was so sure that it would be a UFO that he covered all of us in tin foil and made us memorise a sort of alien greeting...”

She gaped at him. “Münchausen syndrome! Goodness knows you need my help!” she cried. Eeteuk grinned evilly, about to say the very thing Kangin had suggested, when Heechul interrupted, flipping his hair and frowning at Sungmin, who had long ago fallen off his chair in hysterics.

“Excuse me, lady, but I’m late for a makeup and hair session and, as you might understand, I need to keep my “Prettier than a girl” appearance. Mind if I leave?”

She smiled at him and agreed. He walked from the room – or floated, rather, and smired at Eeteuk before he closed the door.

“... Can I go, then?” Henry asked. Everyone jumped. No-body had known he was there.

“ABSOLUTELY NOT!” she replied. “The only reason he may go is because he, evidently, is entirely sane and un-needing of my help, even if he is a little... effeminate...”

Eeteuk gaped, then gathered his wits. “Excuse me,” he began, nudging a giggling Kangin with his bony elbow. “But you’re a medical professional, right? Maybe you can tell me why no matter how hard we try, Kangin and I can’t make a baby~~~~?”

He grinned.

She fainted.

Therapy was over.
 
 
 
(Deleted comment)
fbdongsaengfbdongsaeng on February 1st, 2009 12:39 am (UTC)
*Flops* Hello~~
Ming♥: 강특 - Breaks start in their worldamine87 on January 30th, 2009 11:38 am (UTC)



baby of all questions... xD~
캐로린 » ★ « 눈이 부셔 부셔 부셔 ~♪♫: 강특 - partner MCsrawrcarebear on January 30th, 2009 11:58 am (UTC)
PWAHAHAHA! XDDDD
I was loling by the time the lady freaked over Wookie.
But the ending killed me.
LOL XD ♥
dizzy headrushes and wet eyelashes: silly dork radio boyprototypic on January 30th, 2009 01:25 pm (UTC)
OMG, THE LAST PART

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

I LOVE THIS LOL I'M GONNA ADD IT TO MY MEMORY XD
THE shadowtailmon: boy loveshadowtailmon on January 30th, 2009 11:13 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry to bother you, but do you know where you got that icon? =3
I can't find the link (again) XP
dizzy headrushes and wet eyelashesprototypic on January 31st, 2009 07:00 am (UTC)
i just found it a few days ago, you're in luck XD

http://users.livejournal.com/_honey_vanity_/5944.html#cutid1

HERE YOU GO !
THE shadowtailmon: kibum cuteshadowtailmon on February 4th, 2009 12:01 am (UTC)
LIFE SAVER!!!!
THANK YOU!!!!! X3
fbdongsaengfbdongsaeng on February 1st, 2009 07:37 am (UTC)
o///////o thankyou~~ <3
연아 (YeonAh)yeonah on January 30th, 2009 03:02 pm (UTC)
*dies laughing*
Oh... My... God...
That therapist is nuts, RyeoWook is too cute (especially when he's being 'violent'), HeeChul's... HeeChul, KangIn and EeTeuk are geniuses, and... and... *goes into hysterics*
I love this *mems* Perfect for a day where I want to just drop dead.
fbdongsaengfbdongsaeng on February 1st, 2009 07:36 am (UTC)
o///o thankyou for the memory <333
Eri(kaya) ♫ayakabun on January 30th, 2009 05:03 pm (UTC)
ROFL!
i love the way everything went!
HAHAHA.
/rofl. ♥
Jem: sj - is specialundersaturn on January 30th, 2009 05:42 pm (UTC)
Heechul the sane one?! *dies*

poor therapist, LMAO
There's no obvious, rational form for sadness...: Shuuheimardigrasmaven on January 30th, 2009 10:20 pm (UTC)
LOL KANGTEUK WINS!! THEY MADE HER PASS OUT! PURE GENIUS!!
cho_min on January 30th, 2009 11:13 pm (UTC)
oh... wow. That therapist may actually need more help than Suju... which is saying a lot...
That was absolutely rofltastic, in every sense of the word (except the literal, because I'm sick, and therefore am incapable of rolling on the floor...)
Will there be more? Please say there will be more! Therapy is fun^^
fbdongsaeng: Cloudfbdongsaeng on January 31st, 2009 11:08 am (UTC)
Oh. I hadn't thought about there being more... This was just something I wrote when I couldn't be bothered doing schoolwork but had to make my supervisor think I was doing something worthwhile.

Maybe there will be more, maybe not. We'll see. If I write anything at all from now on, though, it's probably going to be along these lines~~
xxsilentxstarxxxxsilentxstarxx on January 30th, 2009 11:59 pm (UTC)
LOL
you had me rolling from the beginning but the end was just priceless
LOL
now i'm just chillin', feel like i'm healingbambayahh on January 31st, 2009 06:54 am (UTC)
WiNNAAAR♥

“DO NOT BECOME VIOLENT WITH ME, SIR!”
HAHA.

And teh woman must be psycho, Chullie is NOT the sanest member of SUJU. LMAO xD
baby_buggsbaby_buggs on January 31st, 2009 09:52 pm (UTC)
ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 most hilarious thing ever!!!
~lies are true if we believe them~: Sungmin - cuteblacksoul12012 on February 1st, 2009 10:40 pm (UTC)
The only reason he may go is because he, evidently, is entirely sane and un-needing of my help, even if he is a little... effeminate... Sure XD

The end was hillarious!!! LOL
panda3035panda3035 on February 4th, 2009 04:21 pm (UTC)
man..this could be better. more antics like that before she faints.lol
fbdongsaengfbdongsaeng on February 5th, 2009 12:09 am (UTC)
*Shrugs* Like I said at the beginning, it's just something I wrote when I was supposed to be doing work. If it was a serious attempt it would have had more, but it's really just a drabble in the end ^^;
panda3035panda3035 on February 5th, 2009 07:49 am (UTC)
still, good drabble.lol.